First dates are nerve-racking enough without tripping yourself up. Most first-date disasters come down to a handful of avoidable mistakes, and once you know them, they’re easy to sidestep.
We’ve counted down from eight to the one mistake that matters most of all.
8. Pressure them about what happens next
Pushing for a second date, a kiss or an answer on the spot makes people uncomfortable. Everyone needs time to work out how they feel.
If you enjoyed yourself, say so and suggest meeting again. Then let them respond in their own time.
7. Dominate the conversation
Talking about yourself non-stop can come from nerves, but it leaves your date feeling like an audience rather than a partner in the conversation.
Ask open questions, listen properly to the answers, and follow up on what they tell you.
6. Turn up late without warning
Things happen, but leaving someone waiting with no message makes them feel unimportant before you’ve even said hello.
Plan to arrive a few minutes early, and if you’re running late, send a quick message with a realistic arrival time.
5. Be rude to the waiting staff
How someone treats the people serving them says a lot about their character, and your date will notice. Snapping at a waiter or complaining loudly is a big turn-off.
A simple please and thank you goes a long way.
4. Drink too much
A drink can help settle the nerves, but too many and you’ll lose track of what you’re saying and how you’re coming across. It can also leave you vulnerable.
Pace yourself, alternate with water, and stay clear-headed enough to get yourself home safely.
3. Talk about your ex all evening
A passing mention is fine, but a full history of your last relationship makes it look as though you’re not ready to move on.
If the subject comes up, keep it brief and neutral, then steer the conversation back to the two of you.
2. Spend the date on your phone
Checking your phone, even “just for a second”, tells your date they’re less interesting than whatever’s on the screen. It’s one of the quickest ways to kill the mood.
Put it on silent and keep it in your pocket or bag. If you’re expecting something urgent, say so at the start.
1. Pretend to be someone you're not
Exaggerating your job, inventing hobbies or agreeing with everything your date says might seem harmless, but it builds the whole relationship on something that isn’t real. Sooner or later, the truth comes out.
Be yourself, a little nervous and imperfect. The right person will like that version of you, and you’ll never have to keep up an act.
What’s the worst first-date mistake you’ve seen? Share your stories in the comments.
